Yesterday was Marting Luther King, Jr. day and I am proud of the accomplishments he made. The concept that black people in this country could not eat in the same place I ate, lodge in the same place I lodged, etc. is so unbelievable to me. I can’t imagine anyone not welcoming my sweet Nanny or Annie Laura with open arms. Nanny (Cherry Porter) and Annie Laura were/are black women who raised me and taught me so much about being a respectable, loving person – black or white. I remember hearing the word “nigger” one day at school and not knowing what it meant. I came home and asked Nanny what it meant. She didn’t get mad, but put her arm around me and told me that the dictionary defined nigger as a very bad person. She then went on to say, “Honey, don’t you ever forget, there are black niggers and white niggers.” She was fairly old when I was litte. I’m sure she’d encountered her share of “white niggers.” She showed me as much character as anyone I’ve known. Martin Luter King, Jr., in his famous speech, said, “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.” I think we have come a long way in two ways since then. One, black people are gaining much ground in not being judged for the color of their skin. There is still a long way to go, but not at far as 30 years ago. Second, now, not only do we not want to be judged by the color of our skin, but we don’t want anyone to judge us on the content of our character as well. We don’t want people to tell us we are wrong or sinful. We don’t want people to tell us that our lifestyles are dangerous. We’ve once again become an arrogant people.

Two Words: THE RAMS!

I am a solid Viking fan until the Rams play. And I love it when they beat Green Bay! I am so justice minded, that I almost feel avenged when Kurt Warner kicks Bret Farve’s boo-hiney! I hate to see evil win out over good even for a short time. So, when I see Green Bay’s quarterback out there cursing every other breath, throwing a fit, etc and then see Kurt Warner, a devoted Christian, play an almost flawless game, I almost feel avenged! Well, maybe I put too much into football, but Kurt Warner is da man!

“I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the Lord.”
Psalm 40: 1-3

I’ve been battling some very old ghost this past month. Things I don’t want to speak of or even think about. Two songs have been ever on my lips. One by Steven Curtis Chapman: “As I look back on this road I’ve traveled, I see so many times He’s carried me through and if there’s one thing that I’ve learned in my life, my Redeemer is Faithful and True. My Reedemer is faithful and true. Everything He has said, He will do. And every morning His mercies are new. My Redemmer is faithful and true.” The second song is by Rich Mullins. “Sometimes my life just don’t make sense at all. The mountains look so big and my faith just seems so small. So, hold me, Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf. You have been King of my glory, won’t You be my Prince of Peace? And I wake up in the night and peer in the dark. Its so hot inside my soul, I swear there must be blisters on my heart. So, hold me, Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf. You have been King of my glory. Won’t You be my Prince of Peace? Surrender don’t come natural to me. I’d rather fight You for something I don’t really want than take what You give that I need. And I beat my head against so many walls and I’m falling down – I’m falling on my knees. And the Salvation Army Band is playing this hymn and Your grace rings out deep it makes my resistance so thin. So, hold me Jesus, ’cause I’m shaking like a leaf. You have been King of my glory, won’t you be my Prince of Peace?”

I am currently reading a Mother’s Devotional and the author was talking about her sister whose middle name is Joy. Her sister is somewhat mentally and physically disabled, but has such incredible joy about her. I think of all the problems she must encounter and yet her family says that Joy is such an appropriate name for her. I think of my grandmother who, when confined to a wheelchair, never complained, but continually sang, “This is my story. This is my song. Praising my Savior all the day long.” I remember coming in from high school and telling her about my day. She would laugh until tears ran down her face. She had unspeakable joy. I think of the times I complain and feel sorry for myself due to the strain of being a stay at home mother. Yes, its hard, but I’m not stuck in a wheelchair with one leg! I wonder if I could give myself a middle name based on my character, what would it be? If other people could, what would it be? Do I really want answers to that question?